I will wait

I believe this has been the longest I have gone without posting, and each day that has passed I have felt even more guilty for not updating!  Here you go!

Since the the last time I posted, I have been feeling well, overall.  I haven’t had to deal with soreness in the mornings that often.  On the downside, I have noticed an increase in soreness in my wrists, yes, plural.  Just today I noticed a bit of pain starting in my left wrist.  It is so difficult at times to not get discouraged when I have to add yet another pain to the list.  Yesterday afternoon I took a nap and woke up with a headache.  I am pretty sure the headache started after I ate some pasta salad that I do not normally eat.  It turned into a pounding headache by evening which also lead to nausea.  I went to bed with a bucket beside the bed in case, well, you get the point.  I also noticed that my knees were starting to ache, which would lead me to believe I am experiencing another minor flare up.  Thankfully this morning my knees seem to have improved.

I am excited to say that this Thursday I have been dating Matt for a year!  We will both be heading over to his parent’s house for the weekend, and will be joined by Matt’s brother Greg, and his wife Mary.  I always look forward to weekend’s with the Hartman’s!  Matt and I will probably dine somewhere and I am sure between the two of us we both have a few surprises to give to each other.

I wish I could say all of the details have been worked out, but at this point I can happily say that I am seeking full-time nanny jobs in Westerville.  I feel that it is time for me to move out of my parent’s house, as I will be turning 21 in August.  Moving out takes so much preparation, and I am not the kind of person who will spontaneously pack up and leave.  I have been praying extra hard over each aspect of the move.  I know plenty of wonderful girl’s in Columbus who I could potentially room with, and already have two options I can work with. The biggest road block at this point is a job.  I will not move until I know I have a job secured.  I have applied to a nanny agency, and have created an account on another reputable website where people who are looking for caretakers can view my profile.  I have faith that this all can work out, I just have to be patient and trusting.  Throughout this entire process I have never felt so vulnerable.  I am completely leaving this in God’s hands, because if I start making decisions and choices that I feel are right, I know somehow it will fail.  I am waiting for the best possible option that God will provide for me.  I’ve already grown and have learned that waiting for the best will always trump.

Until next time, may I find a full-time job as a nanny!  Nanny Becca just sounds so RIGHT 🙂

 

There IS such thing as a great Monday

May I just say that today has been fantastic?!  After months of looking, Matt, my wonderful boyfriend, has received a full time job!  We both have been praying continuously and it was finally time for that prayer to be answered!  We knew God would supply his need, we just had to be patient.  Philippians 4:19, “And this same God who takes care of me will supply all of your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus”.  I don’t know too much just yet about what Matt will be doing, but he does start May 15th.

In a previous post, I wrote about how God has been rocking my world!  Let me share with you a prime example.  Last month I happened upon Matthew 21:22, ” If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer”.   Even though I’ve read this passage multiple times in the past, it really stuck with me this time.  So, I thought to myself, ANYTHING as long as it’s in God’s will, that’s mind blowing!  I prayed a few “big prayers”, two of which have already been answered!  One of them being that Matt would get a full time job.  The other prayer was that God would place someone in my life whom I could encourage.  I knew that when I asked this, I would have to commit my time to this person and pour out love to them.  So, not even a week or so after I prayed that prayer, I began a wonderful friendship with someone who just so happened to be in NEED of someone to listen.  I am so overjoyed by how faithful God has been to me, and even more joyous after these two prayers have been answered!

Tomorrow is a big day for me.  I’ve successfully transferred rheumatologist’s, and my appointment with my new Dr. begins at 11 A.M.  I am not nervous, I’m rather anxious to hear how I have been responding to the medications I was prescribed back in January.  I’ve written down how I feel each day, along with daily temperatures, which seem to affect how my joints.  I can only hope for positive news, so keep me in your prayers!

A few other positives I noticed today are: I didn’t spend as much on gas as I thought I would.  The sun is shining brightly!  I am in minimal pain today.  After waiting 13 days, I finally get to see Matt tonight.  I hope your day has been enjoyable and blessed just as much, if not more than mine!

Until next time, pray big prayers!

 

Tea for two

The top images are from a month or so ago, when Braden was in the nursery during church.  Jackie(one of my sister’s) and I had nursery duty and I snapped a few photos of Braden’s curiosity towards the tea set.  The bottom picture is from a few week’s ago when our new fridge was delivered.  Braden jumped right in and insisted on “helping”.  Hope you enjoyed your weekly Braden dose 🙂

(Braden is my nephew)

 

Don’t you know, you’re beautiful.

Maybe it’s just me, but recently I’ve sensed the need to write about a topic that I suspect effects every single person, at some point in their life.  Actually, I know without a doubt that it does.  The belief in your beauty- feeling beautiful, and as for you men…handsome.  When I was at college, during the time when my RA was at its worst, I truly recognized how downright sickly I looked.  I was not comfortable with my body, and quite frankly my body wasn’t comfortable with me.  Losing 20 lbs without meaning to had such a negative impact on me, at the time.  It literally hurt to sit because I lost most of my cushion, AKA butt!  I didn’t feel pretty, beautiful, or stunning for that matter whenever I looked in the mirror.  I appeared gaunt, and was much more pale than I am now.  When my dad would rub my shoulders, he would always comment on how he could feel the bones.  Looking back at old pictures from that year, I shudder.

It’s important for each of us to NOT obsess over our image, though I realize that is MUCH easier said than done.  Yes, I am the first to admit that I spend plenty of wasted time on my hair and makeup each morning.  I pinch that stomach fat, spend a half hour each day using teeth whitening strips.  I do at times, but not that often, feel guilty after eating a large meal-that good home cooked meal where having second’s just seems natural.  However, despite all of that negativity, I am proud to say that I have a new approach to my self-image and respect for my body.

Often times, whenever I get discouraged over my appearance, God places something in my mind that snaps me back into reality.  I often refer to this verse found in Matthew 6:28.  “And why worry about your clothes?  Look at the lilies and how they grow.  They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are.  And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won’t he more surely care for you?  You have so little faith!” (NLT)  Each time I hear that verse or read it, I soak it in as if I’ve heard it for the very first time.  It speaks volumes to me.  I so often get caught up with shopping and the thrill of it all, get annoyed when a zit makes a home on the middle of my forehead(yes, I promise it’s that same spot each time), or how fit I could and should be that I forget how beautiful God has created me, and each of us to be.  I believe the verse says to me, “hey Becca…whenever you allow yourself to get so upset over your uniqueness…oh yeah, your body, remember this…when you really look at a flower, not just glance at it, but really observe a flower, it’s absolutely amazing how intricately detailed it is, and not to mention gorgeous.  If a flower is that gorgeous, then DANG you must be ten times prettier.  After all, we were made in the likeness of God”.  Just earlier this afternoon as I was cutting the stems of the flowers Matt bought me, I made a mental note to appreciate flowers more.  Funny cause I had not a clue I was going to be blogging about this topic.  And not only did I not know I was going to be blogging about this topic, I definitely had a “God moment” as I was searching for the verse I mentioned above.  Not even two hours ago, as I was cleaning my room, I found some old “17 magazines” under my dresser.  I noticed that I had written Matthew 6:28 on the corner of the magazine, but didn’t bother to look it up…until it literally presented itself to me just now, as I type this.  Someone out there needs to read this, I’m sure of it.

Why is it that we dwell upon that one negative, hurtful comment, and not the numerous kind compliments people bestow upon us?  It’s as if that one comment has the ability to completely ruin our day, and leave an unseen scar.  We often say that we don’t care what people think about us, yet find ourselves so hurt, so broken.  I have my faith, which drives me to love on others.  You may not agree or understand my beliefs, but I don’t have to prove to you that God exists, He can do that on His own.

I will leave you with this.  I may not know you personally, but I can tell you without a doubt, EACH and EVERY single person is beautiful/handsome.  Meaning, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL/HANDSOME!  Embrace the little freckles, big feet, and curly hair.  Most obviously someone may not be attractive to you, they may not have qualities that appeal to you.  But, who are we to put down others, crush their spirits with such harmful words, when we ourselves have our own imperfections?  We need to lift each other up, compliment way more often than we do, and most of all…love on others.  Not just by saying you love them, but by showing them that you do.

Until next time, make a list of all of the things you love about yourself and feel free to share them with me.  I’d love to hear how you are working on a better self-image.  I will share my list in my next post.